Heh.. Discovered today a part of the reason my voice is so raggedy is because I've been missing my prednisone, so my adrenal hypoplasia might have been acting up.

Today sucked ass. Amy keeps unloading work on Janelle, so I left her most of the job to do tomorrow. (:

Jamie.

Ugh. I'm never smoking weed again. Last time, it only burned my throat. Now my chest hurts and when I cough it's a deep pain. So yeah. Fuck that. XDD Lol@Jamie with smoker's cough. Never fucking again. SCREW YOU DAWN, YOU'RE A REALLY BAD INFLUENCE >_<!!!

kk. He's not my boyfriend, I don't have a crush on him, but I must admit I'm very excited for my friend's boyfriend to move in. XD He's a real sweetheart.. I'm hoping everything's okay. It's still a complete bloody mess here but I'll be cleaning heavy-duty for the next few days. And wtf am I gonna do with that tv and dresser.. I guess I'll just have to put up an ad in a newspaper or something? Ugh.. I dunno what we'll do with them until then... Fuck. :|

I got four messages from some wasted, drunk jackass last night, claiming my number had been calling him. I checked my history and NO. NO I DID NOT. Ugh. It was disgusting. The first message I understood as 'uhh someone from this number called me..' and the rest was just drunken slurring that I couldn't make out. I fucking hate human beings.

Ugh. BUT YAY. :3 Work is going great, too. ^^

~Jamie~

Saw Adam on the bus on the way home from work.

You remember him. The guy that disappeared off msn for weeks, that I hoped just was away. Reality has bashed me in the face. Adam was not interested in me. What's so repulsive about me that everyone looks at me and just wants to ditch and avoid me? My heart hurts a lot.

In other news, I got my Orochimaru cosplay costume!! *_* I just need the wig and make-up, and I'm good to go!!! ;_; MIDII YOU HAVE TO FINISH GETTIN' READY NOW. I'M GOING TO BITE YO THROAT.

Life truly sucks right now. If it weren't for the fact that I'm extremely lazy and can't be bothered to go through the effort of registering for a gun, I'd probably have blown my brains out by now.

I just had a bit of a cry, because I have really nothing to eat.. I'm just so exhausted with life. Why I keep going is a wonder to me u_u

*sighs and goes back to cleaning*

I just had my first seizure.

I can safely say I would like to never have a seizure again. And that I need to lower my blood pressure medication.

My roomie up and left this morning. Part of me is shrilling with happiness. Part of me is thinking 'I'm so fucked'. I have to come up with another $500 before March. Even if I worked really, really hard, it wouldn't matter, because I only get paid once between now and then, so what I got up until tomorrow will be it. My mother's making me feel like shit, subtly reminding me of all the shit she's already helping me with. I feel fucking bad enough asking for money from her. Christ...

I need AISH right fucking now.

Ugh.

Donations welcome? (only though only two people read this XDDD)

Jamie.

I am loving my new job at Dawgs. I got expensive shades for free, and free shoes. I'm so fucking happy there. And one of my friends from the hospital works there! We'll be having lunch together tomorrow, I think.

Rofl, Canadian Idol is going to be at the mall tomorrow and Sunday. I have to admit, a teeny, tiny part of me is considering trying out. XD;; But what stops me is not the thought of being humiliated infront of the judges, but being humiliated infront of hundreds of people. T_T So that'll be a no.

So, all in all, my job is fucking awesome. I hope I can make manager soon, though I don't think I'm ready for the responsibility. It scares me. I don't know how to manage anything. Personally, I'd sooner take a raise and turn down the promotion, but I don't think that's possible. XD;

~Jamie~

...I quit. This morning, I quit. I went to work for about three and a half hours. I knew it might not turn out.. Dawgs shoes hadn't called, so I'd lost hope a bit, but I was still hoping.. If not, I would be willing to work in one of the coffee shops Target was offering.. But I couldn't keep working at Bluenotes. I almost threw up today my back hurt so bad.

...I went to sit in the back, and I looked at my cellphone, and I had a voicemail. From Donna. The owner of the Dawgs shoe store.

I got the job.. ;_;

I am so happy right now... I start tomorrow. Entry pay is $11/hour. Even if I hate the job, I still get paid well for my misery. It just wasn't worth it at Bluenotes. $8.50 an hour for the excruciating pain in my back? The sore hips? The long drawn-out hours? Fuck no.

I'm so happy.. Holy shit.. I'll make rent so easily.. I'm gonna get my car.. It's a '93 Camry, and I'll probably have it by April... God I'm so, so happy..


In other news.. My RP friend on AIM is the silliest fucking person in the world. She's only about a year older than me, but she's married. She lives the married life that I want soooo bad. Her husband orders her dildos. One time, he just randomly smacked her tablet with his penis.

The most recent adventure is that she got a new dildo herself. She was talking about how it had balls and a suction cup and veins, but WTF THE HEAD IS SO PINK. Then she told me she got her husband to grope the balls. I can only imagine how she did that. And what did she do after her husband groped the balls? She hit him in the face with it.

Holy fuck. She's the most awesome person in the world. Srsly. Her marriage is the funniest fucking thing. People who marry young make me sick, but holy shit. To have a marriage like that, with a husband who can deal with all my silly, just like that, is now my dream.

My friend is so freaking funny and cool. Gawd. XD I have to go visit her sometime. I'll stare at her husband, then look at her dildo, and I bet he'll be like '...Don'tdoit. >('. GAWD.

I quit my job T_T I'm so, so relieved. Nnngh!

*does a jig*

I really hope Dawgs calls me. Otherwise, I'm probably gonna be working in a coffee shop -_-;